1. #1

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    Aug 2011
    Lahore, Pakistan
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    raminaesilva: THE JEST

    “I cannot understand. You were great friends, besides being colleagues.
    So, you don`t talk to him anymore?”
    - “No, And I´ll never do, never ever in my entire live. Neither me nor John. He hates him more than I do. What he did is unforgivable. That guy doesn't have limits in his jests.”
    -“What really happened.?”
    -“You see, we three were civil servants and traveled all around the country. We used to stay for some days in the best hotels. We all were over fifty years old and John and me were fat, bald and wore dentures, so our appearance was not that of a hunk. But, anyway, we managed to be womanizers because we had money and power, we were federal inspectors and, you know, the servants that take care, make the beds and everything in the hinterland`s hotels in Brazil, earn a pittance.”

    “ - So, it was not difficult, even if we were not good looking men, to get sexual favors in every place we went. You know - The music women like best is the noise of coins falling in the floor. Besides that, we wore the best outfits, used expensive colognes and by our manners and ways of speaking showed every moment that we were rich and powerful.”

    -“ You see. When I eat a chicken I don`t ask the chicken if it likes me or finds me handsome or agreeable. I just eat the chicken. But, it was always best when they didn't show much repulsion and would, willingly, do whatever we would like them to do about sexual favors. So we took very much care of our appearance, And, something that we always avoided to show was that we had dentures. That is something that brings disgust and sometimes would spoil everything. It would make them lose the spark.”

    - “ When we arrived at the hotel there were some lovely young ladies working as charwomen, but among them, there was one that besides being blonde and lovely, had a wonderful very white smile and seemed to be very much accessible. So, we were waiting for the right moment for the lunging”.

    - ‘ We three used to sleep in the same room. There were three beds. John slept at the right place, I at the left and this scoundrel, Richard, in the middle. Richard always complained because he wanted to read until very late and we wanted to turn out the lights and sleep early. And he complained too because we snored and farted at night. “

    - “But he complained mainly because, just before going to bed, we would take off our dentures and put them in a glass of water. I would put mine at the little table by the side of my bed and John would do the same by the side of his bed. Richard thought that thing disgusting, two sets of teeth laughing at him inside the glasses, - remembering him that we were old and that our validity time was over, - and even tried to change room but, unfortunately for him, the hotel was crowded. So, since we where the majority, two against one, and everything was decided in a democratic way, we prevailed and he had to put up with us. Yes, he was not happy with the situation but we didn't expect that he would act the way he did.”

    -“As I said before, we were in the mood for screwing the little charwoman and only took our dentures off when we knew that she would not come into our room any more and it was late at night. And, the first thing we did when we awoke was to put them immediately , even before going to the loo or taking a shower. After that we groomed. Then we would go to the Breakfast room and filled the girl with schmooze and eulogies.”

    - “Do you know what that miscreant Richard did? At night, when we were sleeping, he changed our dentures. Mine he put into Richard`s glass and Richard`s he put in my glass of water. Then, at dawn, very early in the morning, he shouted:- “Buddies, get up immediately, make haste, the girl is coming in !!!” Suddenly, still drowsy, in the darkness, we rushed to reach our dentures. But they couldn`t fit, one was too small and the other too large and, in the hurry, your can imagine what happened. We rushed to the restroom trying to fix them and it took some time until we understood that we had each other denture in our mouths!”

    -“Don`t you think there was enough reason not to talk to him any more? “

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